Is Loneliness at the Root of Today's Problems?

On NPR the other day I heard a doctor discuss the research into the relationship of loneliness and illness, both physical and mental illness, how loneliness changes body chemistry. It was enlightening,

He referred to loneliness and a multitude of physical illness like heart disease, hbp, stroke, and others. He also talked about the relationship of loneliness and mental illnesses like depression, substance abuse/dependence, and even some psychiatric diagnoses.

He went on to discuss the relationship of loneliness and violent behaviors.

Wow.

And it all made good sense. Loneliness can make people more fearful. Fear can easily lead to anger and acting out behaviors. And it can also lead to withdrawal, depression, low self-esteem. All of these things support the problems we are dealing with as a nation today.

And guess what? Loneliness is easy to treat! We only need to reach out to our neighbors, friends, family, even strangers, to create connection. There is much we can do to reach out to those who are less able to reach out. Don't wait for the lonely to find you. Make contact with those you know who might be experiencing loneliness.

Now, I admit I'm not very good at that. I'm VERY introverted and don't tend to make friends easily. But I know now that I need to work at that to help make the world better, not just to benefit myself.

Some ways to develop this can be as simple as making eye contact with people you come in contact with, people you pass on the street, service people, cashiers, etc. Greet folks with a smile and a "Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening."

Whenever it is appropriate, reach out a hand to touch a shoulder or forearm, shake hands. If it is someone you know, give them a quick hug. [Always get permission to hug. Abuse victims can be re-traumatized by unwanted touch.]

Even small talk can build relationships over time. Find some excuse to ask your neighbor a question, create a conversation. Drop off a plate of cookies or something, just because. You don't have to wait for the Holidays.

If you attend worship services, don't rush to be the first one out the door. Linger a bit to greet other worshipers. Attend social events with your faith community and get to know other folks.

Make an effort to contact/get to know people who live alone, especially those with disabilities that make it difficult to leave the house. Imagine being housebound and alone. Take them a little something - a magazine they might enjoy, a bit of baked goods if they are not diabetic, a book of word and number puzzles, etc. But most of all, stay a few minutes to chat. Brighten their day.

Get to know people you think may be feeling intimidated or threatened by someone. Become an ally. Let them know you are there for them if they need something or someone.

Each of us can change the world of someone who is experiencing loneliness. And the statistics they quoted said that 70% of Americans reported they experience loneliness.

Imagine if we could help people be healthier and happier simply by being there for and with them! Help people feel heard, seen, and valued.

Reach out. America needs you! The world needs you! You need you!