Wednesday, November 16, 2016

So, What DO You Want?

What have you decided about your attributes/goals for YOUR life? Which of those listed are highest priority for you? [You can always look at previous posts to refresh your memory.] Are you investing proportionally in those that are your highest priority? If not, that may be what keeps you from being truly happy and truly authentic.

After looking inward you can begin now to chase after what you REALLY want and follow what is true for YOU. When you are doing this you cannot help but help others somehow.,

Way too many people are terrible unhappy with their jobs. The stay in them for the financial reward of a paycheck and health insurance. But they take no pleasure in the jobs and the rewards give them little pleasure either. They feel stuck and become resentful. They would rather do stuff that feels authentic than because of the reward.

One way to address this dissatisfaction, if you see no way to change jobs, is to look for ways to do the job that relate to the attributes/goals that are your highest priorities. Let's look at them again:

  • Affiliation: to have satisfying relationships with family and friends
  • Community feeling: to improve the world through activism or generosity
  • Conformity: to fit in with other people
  • Financial success: to be wealthy and materially successful
  • Hedonism: to experience much sensual pleasure
  • Image: to look attractive in terms of body and clothing
  • Physical health: to feel healthy and free of illness
  • Popularity: to be famous, well-known, and admired
  • Safety: to ensure bodily integrity and safety
  • Self-acceptance: to feel competent and authentic
  • Spirituality: to search for spiritual or religious understanding 

  • Take some time to consider how you might invest in your higher priority attributes/goals in your job. Be creative. Think outside the box. Talk to someone you trust to brainstorm things you can change about your job - how you do it - that is more authentically you. 

    And, of course, consider changing jobs. This might mean going for some training or education that prepares you for something new. Or it might mean exploring what tasks you do in this job that would transfer to another kind of work. Or it might mean developing better life-skills/people-skills that help you advance in your job to another level or location.

    You may be in a situation where there is no way to leave your job because of financial or health reasons. So you might need to set a long-term goal about how long you need to continue before you can leave it. And while you are  getting to that time limited goal you can change your perspective about your goal in order to get through it intact. 

    I was in a job situation once that I came to hate. It was not going to take me where I wanted to go in my career and I was feeling really stuck. Every morning that I had to go to work I was depressed and angry. It was affecting my health, both physical and mental. So I figured out how much money I would have to have saved in order to just quit and look for another job. I figured three months of my income would do it. So I started saving as much money as possible until I reached that goal. It made going in to work so much easier, because my goal was to earn enough in that job to be able to quit! It worked for me! While the job wasn't any better, my attitude definitely was. And that make the days go better. Thankfully, I was offered a better job in the organization that would lead to my career goals and didn't have to actually quit one job and go job hunting. I'd learned a valuable life-lesson about using my personal power to control my attitude and make my life easier.

    You may also make your life better by pursuing your priority life goals outside your job. Your job is just one part of your life. It doesn't have to be the most important part, however. It may just be what you do in order to pay your bills. You can get fulfillment in many ways by becoming involved in community activities, in developing relationships, by improving your health and wellness, by developing spiritually, or by making the world a better place.

    By now can you see how making yourself happy you can make the world a better place? From the world that is immediately around you to the world that stretched out beyond you, everything you do affects the world. When you are living authentically, your effect is to make everything better.

    Be happy! But you are the only one who can make that happen.

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