How Do You Celebrate Your Birthday?

When I was growing up, birthdays were a big day at our house. There was always a birthday cake, except for my older brother who sometimes asked for lemon merainge pie instead. 

Sometimes we had a party with our friends invited, where we'd make party hats and play games and get little presents.

My mother seemed to always enjoy celebrating our birthdays. It was like it was our own personal holiday. I doubt if they had much to celebrate with when she was growing up and wanted us to have better.

For much of my adulthood my birthday was not terribly special, especially when I had no loving spouse. The kids would make me cards, though, and insist I bake a cake. For a long time I was single when my husband left us. We were really broke and the presents were usually what the kids made and a check in the mail from my Mom.

Then I was single and my kids were gone. I got birthday cards, usually, from friends, but I was still really poor, so didn't do much celebrating. I was struggling to go to graduate school and working a part-time job. It was a very lonely time because I commuted to school and wasn't involved in school activities. And I was living alone in a friends house as a house sitter. I had a couple of local friends and they checked in on me. But for the most part it was very lonely.

I finally finished school.  I had been living in a little cheap apartment. I had two temporary very part-time clerical jobs and couldn't find a job in my field in the town where I was living. I couldn't keep up with my expenses, so I gave up housekeeping and went to live with my mother in Columbus, Ohio. She, of course, always remembered my birthday. After a bit there I found a temporary job in my field and then a permanent one. Things were looking up.

My birthday is in February. In Central Ohio, that month is the grayest month, cold and damp and depressing. So after I moved into my own place, I began celebrating February as BGTL Month - Be Good to Lucinda Month. Every day of February I do something that makes me happy, makes me feel good.

It is sometimes hard to come up with 28 things, but I always manage. You see, being good to myself doesn't have to be a big thing. While there are some special things I do, any small thing can feel good. This month is no different. So far I've had Wendy's chili, which I really like. And spent an afternoon playing with my great-granddaughter. Today I will spend time doing art work.

While these are all rather normal things, the perspective of doing them as a way I am being good to myself makes all the difference. Why don't you try it? Whatever month your birthday falls in, spend it being good to yourself. Can't manage it for a month? Start with your birthday week.

Hope you have a happy birthday month, too! Let me know how it goes. And if you have suggestions for things I might do to BGTL, please leave them in a comment. (Actually, your comment will make my day special!)

Is Today Your Birthday?

No? Give yourself a gift anyway. You deserve it. It's actually important to your well-being. And the gift that you can give yourself is to do a good deed.

Yes, really. Doing a good deed for someone else is giving yourself the gift of happiness and pride. When we do something for someone else, when we add to their happiness, we get a little happiness in return. And we can feel a bit of pride that we took some time and energy for something beyond ourselves.

So, whether it is your birthday or not, go do a good deed, a small act of kindness. If it IS your birthday, why not share some of it with someone who needs a little cheering up?

There are countless ways to be kind, to act with kindness, not just think kind thoughts. Some days it may just be smiling at people, no matter what you are feeling. Or maybe you call someone who doesn't get out much or you haven't seen in a long time just to check in and see how they are doing. Maybe they need to know someone thinks of them, cares about them.

Or maybe you can make the opportunity to go out of your way for someone to help them with something. I'm sure if you start thinking about good deeds, start looking for opportunities you will find plenty things you might do. If you are really stuck you can go back through some of my earlier posts from last year when I talked about acts of kindness and had lists at the end of each post.

And when you do for others, all are blessed. You, the person you do the deed for, and anyone who sees/hears about it and is inspired to do something for someone else. It spreads out and touches the world around you.

So make a difference with a good deed, an act of kindness, a gift.

And I'd love it if you shared what your good deed was. I can add it to my list of ideas! And maybe another reader will be inspired.

So, Happy Birthday! - or Happy This Day!
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